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Rebellion in Young Boys and Teens

Want to find a good boarding school for your young boy who struggles with rebellion
Vision Boys Academy in Sarcoxie, MO understands that you want to find a safe, positive environment where he can change and grow!

At Vision Boys Academy, we believe that a program of consistent daily living can help your struggling young boy learn how to make the right decisions. Some boys simply need to learn the love of Christ. Some need a more concentrated effort to catch up in school. Some need to learn the importance of respecting others–and themselves. And some just need a change of environment.

Leading at-risk boys, ages 8-12, to be Godly and upright young men–that’s our purpose! We want to help your boy deal with his rebellion issues.

Please call us today for more information about our program. (417) 246-1114


How Rebellion Starts…
During the teenage years, the area of the brain called the prefrontal cortex is developing. This is the part of your brain that is behind your forehead. It’s your thinking cap and judgment center… which means kids can now develop their own ideals and ideas.

But how do parents distinguish between normal and abnormal rebellion in an adolescent? 1

What Is Teenage Rebellion?

Teenage rebellion is an act of highest assertion of independence and little adherence to parental advice during the teen years of a child’s life. It is called a “rebellion” because it leads to an intense confrontation between the teen and parents. Teenage rebellion may seem spontaneous and illogical for parents, but there are several underlying reasons behind the behavior. 2

Two common types of rebellion are against socially fitting in (rebellion of non-conformity) and against adult authority (rebellion of non-compliance). In both types, rebellion attracts adult attention by offending it.

The young person proudly asserts individuality from what parents like or independence from what parents want, and in each case succeeds in provoking their disapproval. This is why rebellion, which is simply behavior that deliberately opposes the ruling norms or powers that be, has been given a good name by adolescents and a bad one by adults.

Parents usually dislike adolescent rebellion not only because it creates more resistance to their job of providing structure, guidance, and supervision, but because rebellion can lead to serious kinds of harm.  3

  • It can cause young people to rebel against their own self-interests, rejecting childhood interests, activities, and relationships that often support self-esteem.
  • It can cause them to engage in self-defeating and self-destructive behavior, like refusing to do school work or even physically hurting themselves.
  • It can cause them to experiment with high-risk excitement, like accepting dares that as a children they would have refused.
  • It can cause them to reject safe rules and restraints, like letting impulse overrule judgment to dangerous effect.
  • And it can cause them to injure valued relationships, pushing against those they care about and pushing them away.

So adolescent rebellion is not simply a matter of parental aggravation; it is also a matter of concern. Vision Boys Academy for young troubled boys may be able to help.

Although the young person thinks rebellion is an act of independence, it actually never is. It is really an act of dependency . Rebellion causes the young person to depend their self-definition and personal conduct on doing the opposite of what other people want.

That’s why the antidote for rebellion is the true independence offered by creating and accepting a challenge — the young person deciding to do something hard with themselves for themselves in order to grow themselves. The teenager who finds a lot of challenges to engage with, and who has parents that support those challenges, doesn’t need a lot of rebellion to transform or redefine him or herself in adolescence. 3

How To Know If Your Teen’s Rebellion Has Gone Out Of Hand? 

Here are some signs that the rebellion has overshot its limits: 

  • Prolonged display of annoyance and aggression towards parents or other family members.
  • Change in attitude. Less interaction with family members.
  • Always giving short and rude answers.
  • Open defiance even when outdoors or deliberately doing things asked not to be done.
  • Having no qualms about indulging in risky behavior activities like tobacco usage and alcohol consumption. 4

Normal Teen Behaviors

During normal adolescence, you might observe any of the following about your child’s behavior:

  • Is moody and secretive
  • Spends much of his time alone in his room
  • Gets frustrated easily and stomps out of the room
  • Is short-tempered and impatient, especially with parents
  • Doesn’t want to spend time with the family
  • Is late for curfew
  • Says things like, “Only my friends understand me! I hate it here, I wish I could leave.”
  • Is discontented and restless
  • As unpleasant as it is at times, this is all part of their way teens and pre-teens individuate from their parents—it’s part of the transition from childhood to adulthood.  4

Out-of-Control Teen Behaviors

But some behaviors are not normal. Rather, they’re warning signs. The following behaviors fit into this category:

  • Stealing
  • Being physically abusive to others or destructive in the house
  • Being verbally abusive, intimidating or threatening
  • Abusing a younger sibling
  • Coming home drunk or high
  • Staying out all night
  • Getting arrested

Make no mistake—there’s something wrong with these behaviors. Parents who tell themselves “it’s just phase” or “it’s what teenagers do” are setting themselves up for a rude awakening later on.

If any of this is going on in your house, remember that the earlier you intervene with your child, the better. The sooner you tell your child that what he’s doing is not acceptable and give him the tools he needs to behave differently, the better. 4

For help and information about our program for young at-risk boys, ages 8–12, and how we help them deal with rebellion, call us at Vision Boys Academy today (417) 426-1114.

We’re here to help your boy and family!

Sources:

  1. https://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/teenagers-why-do-they-rebel#1
  2. https://www.momjunction.com/articles/teen-rebellion_00389300/
  3. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/200912/rebel-cause-rebellion-in-adolescence
  4. https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/is-it-an-adolescent-phase-or-out-of-control-behavior/
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